You know what sucks?! At night, something can sound so good and feel right but then when the morning comes, you realize that you just fucked up a lot of things. Maybe, I just let my emotions get to me. And oh-how I wish I meant a little more then a symphony of heavy breathing and the friction of hips. But like I said, I didn't want to be another one of your girls, in the end, I did. I hate to say this but I lost the upper hand I had. I gave in, thinking it was a good idea and that something positive would develop but what wishful thinking that was. I think I have it right and I just let myself let down. How easy it is for someone to pretend that they care??! Well, its pretty damn easy, if you ask me. I just don't understand how people do it. I care about people too much and in the end, thats what I get taken advantage of the most. So honestly, how could you say those things when you know they don't mean anything?? And you know very well that I can't keep my hands to myself. I fall for it everytime, I believe what your saying is true. Once you capitvate my head, you can have my body. I need to learn the difference between truth and lies.

Ohhhhh SNAP!! 

I HAVE A MYSPACE CRUSH!!!

I'm a dork. I know.

PS. I LOVE school and I'm so happy that I'm getting my life somewhat together. I feel really good with T.A.B.C. I feel at place in a sense. I want these 7 months to fly by so I can get some more hands on experience. And while growing in my field and someday, just maybe some day, I will have a wonderful salon that will be my own little katie child.

But when I get on the floor, I have coupons to give out for waxing, massages, facials so come in! its cheap, nothing is over like pshhh $10.

My horoscope yesterday: Tuesday, Feb. 28th, 2006

Cancer (June 22-July 22):

You have a way of making melancholy beautiful.Your mood today is like a Death Cab for Cutie song: "Sorrow drips into your heart through a pin hole, just like a faucet that leaks, and there is comfort in the sound. . ."

You give and give and give. While everyone takes and takes and takes and takes. You think you are over someone, you know that point when you don't think about them everyday, at least 48927 times a day, and then one random encounter....in a quick instant, its all back to the beginning. The feelings just flood in, you can't avoid it. I hate it. I don't want to feel this anymore.

He gave you everything you wanted. He gave you his whole life. I just don't understand how you can disrespect him, ruining a level of trust, and cheat on him like its nothing. Did you forget you are married?! Something has to change. I want to tell him so bad. I want to protect him and let him know somehow without giving out names. But I want to be that girl so badly. I want to have what she is throwing away so easily because I know you are so much more than that. You deserve someone better.